Humans are
romantic beings and love and fear dominates most of what we think. So how to
make a relationship last with love and avoid that fear of betrayal, perfection
and egoism?
Love has always
been a mystery and unfortunately not all humans can find true love and even
when they have found their soul mate, they can’t maintain it.
Love is not
everything but it is also the key to a long-lasting relationship and without
love, there's no meaning to life.
What I’m
going to talk with you is all about wisdom and using your wisdom is one
of steps to attract your soulmate and how to make a relationship
last once you've found your soulmate.
Despite
painful experiences and breakups, we all continue to believe in love,
preferably in a lasting love relationship.
But why is
it so difficult to achieve? There are many factors behind why a relationship
cannot be maintained.
But of the
many factors, some of them are motivated by unnecessary selfishness.
We can’t get
rid of all the problems but our wisdom will determine how they can be dealt
well.
This article tries to provide some practical solutions about how to create a long-term relationship, a lasting relationship. Keep reading and get the benefits!
1. Get closer without getting lost ...to make a relationship last
Love implies an "us", without making the "I" and the
"you" disappear.
In a
relationship, we are constantly adapting to each other. Maintaining the balance
between "union" (the "we") and "individualities"
(the "I" and the "you") is the very essence of the verb to
love.
But this
search for balance is subject to many tensions ... Sometimes the "we"
wins and we aspire to a little more "I"; sometimes it's the opposite.
Love is therefore called to be reborn every day, which requires some effort, sometimes pleasant ... sometimes less! So…keep it hot and spicy!
2. Benevolence, availability and involvement
In fact, some people are made for each other and do not have much effort to
find this balance, but if everything flows naturally, this effort for the other
that provides a stimulating tension is then lacking.
On the other
hand, other couples have more trouble, with stronger tensions, but an even more
exciting relationship.
3. What makes one pair stay the course while another will fail?
We have
three words: kindness, availability and involvement.
Couples must
have the will to be there for each other (benevolence), to be able to count on
each other in case of need (availability) and of these two characteristics
naturally follows the third.
But beware,
these three notions form an ideal, which we will never quite reach, we will
always be trying to reach it.
You cannot
reach perfection but you can try to get close to it.
These are two different things; perfection and approaching perfection. But the second one seems more human and reasonable.
4. Matrimonial agencies and dating sites
Nevertheless, dating sites and marriage agencies try to match people with
scientific knowledge:
There is
obviously a rational basis for a relationship: some are looking for their like,
for example, so there is they are likely to meet a person with similar tastes,
but it is impossible to predict whether the click will be or not, and that's
what makes love so mysterious.
However, we
shouldn’t deny the usefulness of dating sites and marriage agencies:
Many singles
are looking for a partner and do not know where to find him / her. Online
platforms and marriage agencies are obviously filling a gap.
But how can
we get a healthy and sustainable relationship?
When we find
our soul mate the struggle does not end here. We still have to foster that
relationship so that it stays as long as possible.
The essence
of a long-term relationship is a healthy and quality relationship.
There are several
types of relationships that can be tried, one of which is a karmic
relationship, but in the end all lead to how we treat our partner properly.
It is not
always easy to create a quality relationship. Indeed, most of us live immersed
in routine and we do not even manage to recreate new ones.
Before
engaging new loves, it is first necessary to come to love oneself.
It is not
usual for a relationship to begin with conflict and negative experiences.
Let's start
from the premise that any beginning of a relationship goes well. In this sense,
the ball is inevitably in your camp when starting the match.
We live in
an incessant whirlwind of emotions, fragile relationships and sentimental
haste. So what can you do to create quality relationships?
After
talking about the prerequisites to enter into a love relationship.
I now speak of those special abilities to maintain a relationship with quality, after all, it is not enough to sell the fish and then not to deliver the product in good condition.
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5. Delicacy to make a relationship last
There are those who preach honesty and sincerity to the test and with this
excuse many people act like elephants walking in a jewelry store.
This
tendency to get right to the point and talk it all over in the face just
because intimacy has given this license is one of the most destructive factors
in a relationship.
I still think that delicacy should be even greater with the people we live with and who are the ones with the most we have the chance to create wear and tear. It takes more love than sincerity.
6. Autonomy
A feature rarely mentioned in the art of living together is the ability to maintain some independence from the other.
As adults we
can do anything on our own with or without help.
It may take
longer or be more boring, but there should be nothing that we were unable to
resolve on our own.
If your soulmate wants you back again it doesn’t mean both of you sacrifice your independence.
7. Negotiation capacity
Nothing
wiser than someone who knows what to say, how to talk, when to talk, and the
right person to talk about a dilemma.
When it
comes to a couple it is very common to notice the complete inability of one or
both of them to deal with sensitive issues wisely.
At any
moment the couple will be confronted with divergences, incompatibilities or
simply differences of rhythms.
Most are too
sensitive to notice that differences are not wars and that everything can be
negotiated in this life.
At the
moment of an impasse they act like blind mules, they speak and do what seems to
be more convenient for themselves and completely disregard what the other needs
and asks for.
Time will reveal the consequence of this kind of insensitivity, the shipwreck will be certain.
8. Resilience to make a relationship last
Resilience is the degree of resilience and adaptability that a physical object has before certain conditions of temperature, pressure and humidity.
Psychology
borrowed the term to describe the ability of certain people to withstand
pressure.
Even a fool
is able to recite poems and speak good things in the ear in times of favorable
tide; the very challenge is to do so when a wild crisis knocks at the door.
I remember
the scene in the Titanic movie where the ship sank and the orchestra kept
playing to help make everyone's escape route less painful.
If you give up your projects with ease, everything starts and ends nothing is a good candidate to do the same when the pressure comes in the life of the couple.
9. Generosity and empathy
If you are that kind of person who thinks you have a red carpet stretched out
before you or does not get up or get a drink of water; your relationship will
probably be a disaster.
An important
part of building a long relationship is having the generosity of putting
yourself in the other's place and making sacrifices, compromises and efforts
even in the days of laziness, cold and moodiness.
When the
relationship ends they are surprised and think that they loved in earnest.
If one is
suffocated and overwhelmed in the relationship it is a sign that generosity has
passed away from that relationship.
Hopefully this article can answer some of your questions about how to make a relationship last and take care of it.
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